"Worth the Wait" Part 1

“There has to be another way.”

A young bride, dressed in a magnificent array of wedding finery, stood anxiously outside the mahogany doors of the chapel. She was dressed in pure white, from the dainty heeled shoe that occasionally peeked from under the abundant folds of the satin gown, to the half-blown rose placed among her chestnut tresses surrounded with a delicate spray of baby’s-breath. In her hand she held a solitary white rose, its faultless form and color symbolizing the innocence of the hand and heart that held it. But behind that glad light in her large hazel eyes was a look of earnest concern.

“There has to be another way,” she repeated quietly with a small shake of her head.

“I’m afraid not,” an usher said. “In order to provide such a stunning view, the building was placed with its back against the edge of the cliff. The only way to access the back of the chapel is first to enter through these front doors, cross in front of the altar, and pass through the aisle.”

“But the groom is already inside,” the mother of the bride objected. “He would see her as she walked through. We can’t have that.”

“I’m sorry, ma’am. But there is no other choice.”

The mother let out a sigh and turned to her daughter. Reaching forward and gently stroking a wavy lock she whispered, “I’m afraid this is the way it has to be, sweetheart. In the end it won’t really matter that much.”

“Oh but it will,” the bride asserted. “I’ve waited so long for that moment when I walk down the aisle and he sees me for the first time. Until that moment, my beauty, my heart, and my innocence will have been shaded and hidden from him. Oh mother, only when a woman is ready to pledge before God her life and her very being to one man should her full beauty be revealed. Until that moment he has no right to look on her. That is why I could not bear for him to see me before our time. I want to save that moment. I want to see his face, his eyes during that first glimpse of my unveiled beauty. It is important to me… and to him,” she added with dewy, dropped lashes.

“There is another way,” a serious voice said slowly after a pause. It belonged to another, older usher whom the bride and her mother had never seen before. “There is another way, but it is one few brides take. For many look down upon it, calling it strange and unnecessary.” He paused, as though testing the willingness of the bride. The earnest entreaty and newfound hope in her eyes urged him to continue. “There is a path which reaches the back door, but it first takes you down the hill, across the chasm floor, and straight up the face of the cliff. It is a long journey, tiring and extremely difficult. Many times you will be tempted to go back as the sun reaches its height and showers its burning rays upon your face, as your friends and family call you “fool!” and forsake you, and as your limbs tire from the never-ending strain of battle. But,” he said after another pause, “if you complete the journey, you will enter through the back doors, standing afore the altar where your future husband waits. You will have saved the revealing of your beauty for that one moment. Is this what you seek?”

“Yes,” answered the bride, “oh yes!”

“Then there is the path,” he said, pointing to a woodland trail to the right of the chapel. The way looked easy enough, slanting downward slightly but not to the point of difficulty, so the young bride walked briskly toward it. But in reaching the path, she also reached a point on the hill that enabled her to see into the chasm and view the side of the cliff she would later have to climb. Her eyes widened in fear and doubt began to creep into her heart. For the chasm was so deep she could not see its bottom, only hear a distant howl rising from its center. The cliff was as high as the chasm was deep, with sharp, angry stones jutting up and threatening every side. Questions tiptoed into her mind. Was she strong enough to complete the journey? Would anyone dare stay by her side all the way? What if she fell only steps from the chapel door? What if along the way her face was dirtied or her dress torn, taking away from the beauty she was so anxious to guard?

Without taking her eyes from the awful path she whispered to the usher the most important question in her mind… “Is it worth it?

He took her hand, turning her gaze from the cliff and back to the path saying, “It will be worth it. Trust me; it is well worth the fight… and it is well worth the wait.”

To be continued...

A Tribute to a True Role Model

We all need role models—people to look to as inspiration for the bettering of ourselves. But as I look at common role models in today’s culture, I am sadly disappointed. Names such as Reese Witherspoon, Tina Turner, Oprah Winfrey, Taylor Swift, Kate Winslet, and Justin Beiber are the most common names appearing on top ten lists. And for what reason? Justin Beiber and Taylor Swift made these lists simply because they avoided serious scandal. They have never been caught doing anything terribly wrong. But what about admiring someone for the things they have done, not for what they haven’t?

I have quite a few role models. They range from Biblical characters and missionaries, to simple, yet incredible women like my mom or my speech coach (I love you Mom and Mrs. Cary!) But while I love and admire them all, today I want to focus on the story of a woman who has made a huge impact on my life and on the lives of many others. This woman is Sono Harris.

Though Sono Harris is best known through the accomplishments of her children, she did not always want to be a wife and mother. At the age of nineteen (when she met Mr. Harris), nothing could have been further from her mind. She was a talented ballet dancer and had hopes of a professional career. However, after being forced to step back from ballet because of an ankle injury, Mrs. Harris slowly began to re-think her life. And on February 17, 1973, she and Gregg Harris were married.

In 1981, when Joshua was five years old, they made the then radical decision to homeschool. This was the beginning of Sono’s work in the homeschool movement. As the family grew to include Joel, Alex, Brett, Sarah, Isaac, and James, her expertise in homeschooling grew as well. She became passionate about homeschooling, believing it was a “God-given responsibility to provide [her] children’s education” and began to share her passion with others. Soon Mr. and Mrs. Harris were pioneers and avid advocates of the homeschool movement, publishing several works that have come to be regarded as classics by many home educators.

But her main impact came in the form of her children. According to her son Isaac, “She didn’t think her children would be amazing, she made them amazing. She pushed them to do great things.” Her eldest son Joshua is now the bestselling author of many titles including I Kissed Dating Goodbye and is a strong advocate of emotional and physical purity. Second eldest son, Joel, is a talented musician, heading the Northwest Worship Academy. Her twins Alex and Brett also became bestselling authors at the age of 19 with their book Do Hard Things. And who knows what her younger children will accomplish in the coming years. Because of Mrs. Harris’ faithfulness in raising her children as God called her to do, she left a huge impact upon millions of lives… including mine.

I never had the privilege of meeting Mrs. Harris before she passed away from cancer, yet I love her dearly and treasure the memory and the lessons she left behind. Her life has touched mine in incredible ways. Through her example I have been inspired to be a wife and mother just like her, filled with dedication, drive, and passion for the things of God. From her I have learned to “hustle while I wait” and that, regardless of how things may seem at the time, being faithful in what God has placed before you is all that matters.

Not only did she teach me things through her own life and example, but she indirectly taught me many valuable lessons through the lives of her children. Through Josh I have learned the importance of emotional purity and of saving my first kiss for marriage. Through Joel, I have often been blessed and touched by his music. Through Alex and Brett, my world was turned upside down with the challenge to do hard things for the glory of God. And through a friendship with Isaac, I have learned to laugh at myself.

Two years ago today Mrs. Harris went on to be with the Lord. While many still grieve her loss, she still lives on as an incredible example of a woman committed to Christ, a true role model for young women coming after her. She was a Proverbs 31 woman whose:

“… children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘many daughters have done well, but you excel them all.’ Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.” ~Proverbs 31:28-30

Thank you, Mrs. Harris.

Victory in Christ

“If you could go back three years ago, to when you first started speech and debate, what advice                                                                   would you give yourself?”

Normally, my answer to this question would be routine. I’d put on a know-it-all-coach attitude, and give the 10 step process on how to succeed in speech and debate. I’d list the common pitfalls for all novices, describe and demonstrate correct “popping”, and go to great lengths explaining the need for deep character development in interps.

Humorous Interpretation finalists... goofing off one last time.

However, halfway through Nationals, my final competing tournament, it became clear to me that all those “how-to-be-a-great-interper-tips,” although extremely helpful, were not my most valuable lessons. Yes, I had learned so much regarding acting and public speaking skills. Yes, I had been blessed with many achievements and wins. And yes, I had even been given coaching opportunities and chances to share my speeches outside of the league. But as I pondered the question my friend Katherine had posed to me, the reality of how unimportant those lessons and achievements were suddenly became clear. At the end of the day, the lesson I have learned most is not how to give the best impression of Snow White or an Italian hand-mirror. The most important lesson I learned, and what I would go back and tell myself if I could, is described in one word: Surrender.

Surrender in regards to speech and debate came into play the first day of my first tournament. At that time, the message of the best-selling book “Do Hard Things” was my greatest passion. After all, I was only in speech and debate because it was a “hard thing.” So I wanted to share my passion with others by writing a speech about it. Not necessarily a bad thing, but I went into it with the wrong attitude. I believed I was going to wow everyone with my charm, knowledge, and skill. I was positive I would knock every other competitor off their feet and win an easy 1^st place in one try. (Proverbs 16:18 anyone?)

That first speech was the worst I have ever given. I went 4 minutes over time, had dozens of stumbles, burst out crying, and experienced several memory glitches so long that I nearly walked out. I had failed, miserably. But as I found a private corner and sobbed my heart out, that day marked the beginning of my journey to surrender. God forced me to see my utter inadequacy. He showed me how impossible it is to do anything without His strength. And He asked me to completely surrender any and every speech I would give from then on. Through my tears, I promised I would.

But as the tournaments and years rolled on, I have realized surrender is not a one-time commitment. It is constant, even daily. Every speech I have performed since that day has been soaked in prayer. Each has its own story, for each had to be individually surrendered.

I have also come to realize that surrender goes far beyond speech and debate. Yes, I’ve known that for a long time, but my final tournament pressed it even deeper into my heart. For Nationals was extremely difficult. My speeches, relationships, future, as well as my emotional, physical, and spiritual life all were attacked and pushed to their limits. Being the complete drama queen that I am, I just wanted to find my pillow and cry. Yet through every moment of that tournament, I could hear a still small voice whispering, “Surrender.”  And as I surrendered, God poured out undeserved blessings upon me.

So as my years of competitive speech and debate have come to an end, if you were now to ask me what I would go back and tell myself, this would be my answer:

Surrender. From the moment you begin considering topics to the time to give your final performance, surrender it all to Christ. Don’t say a quick prayer and then delve into writing your speech. Refuse to pen a single word until God has given you clear guidance. Andrew Murray says, “We ask God first to bless our feeble efforts, instead of absolutely refusing to go unless God goes before us.” Give God the pen long before you sit to write. Allow Him to mold your speeches and your own life story. Never hold anything back from Him. Never think you are the best or that you know the best. Give him your speeches, your debate rounds, your friendships, and your life.

Surrender to Him, remembering that the harder the battle, the stronger the pain, the deeper the ache… all the more complete and fulfilling is the victory found in Christ.

Overwhelmed by yet another blessing.